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Post by Beelzebibble on Dec 26, 2008 13:11:23 GMT -5
The grand Exodus Amphitheater, locked and barred since the non-end of its last ceremony, has finally been reopened to the public. Every surface has been polished until gleaming, and the stage nearly glitters under the bright lights. Forum celebrities like Kevin, Bub@ and Kuroboom are given seats of honor in the audience. Hearts swell in anticipation! The music swells in greeting. For here comes the host, Pohatu, to begin at last the 2008 Lugiasian Awards Ceremony...! Uh, sorry. Little carried away there. I don't know what got into me. Anyway, here we go with the awards! But not all at once. Today we start off with the People's Choice Awards. Tomorrow it's the Razzies, and so on through the rest of the award categories. After I post the winners each day, you guys get the mike. Comment! If you won something, give us an acceptance speech. If you didn't win an award you wanted, g'wan and gripe and groan! If you have Miscellaneous Observations, those are cool too. Just post! Without further ado... THE PEOPLE'S CHOICE AWARDS FRIENDLIEST MEMBERThis one was easy. A vast majority of voters were wooed by this member's affable and personable ways. I don't hesitate to present the ceremony's first award to SV! FUNNIEST MEMBERLot of support for all the nominees here, not that all of them deserved it -- Lee, I'm looking directly at you through Wowposter's head -- but in the end the one who scraped the most votes is none other than our resident snarky, sarcastic cynic. Wait, we have lots of those. Never mind. It's Choobs. HAPPIEST MEMBERPlenty of happy types being vouched for here, but I've got to give this one to a certain guy with a great attitude. Ever cheerful and upbeat, he can also take writing and RPing criticism like a champion, which is a sure sign of someone with a good self-image. This award goes to Kazkame! COOLEST MEMBERI attribute the overwhelming success of one member in the votes for this award to her mad legit East Coast slang. We're suckers for it, it's plain to see. Totes obvs. All right, no more Pohatu embarrassing himself. V101, here you go. SMARTEST MEMBERI really have no idea how Pohatu won this one. I'm pretty sure both of the other nominees have a lot more brainpower. And, listen, I'm not trying to project false modesty here to make myself look good -- there are other awards I've won that I good and deserved -- but this one was a surprise. Weird! Guys, for future reference, I'm not incredibly smart, okay? WISEST MEMBERHe's been a Pokeschooler for longer than just about any of us who are still active, except DL and V101... and maybe Kuroboom? Ah, well, if I haven't given it away already, I'll keep you waiting no more to hear the name of the sagest member of the forum. It's one Bulbs. MOST DEDICATED MEMBERThere were two major front-runners for this award, but in the end I'm glad to have been able to concede it to the man who friggin' gave us Archie Exie. Lee, your award, sir. MOST CREATIVE MEMBERMasterminding Mafia, SSB Archie Exie, the House system, the Freewebs site, Archipedia Exodus, oh and let's not forget the Sniflish Invasion -- one member stood out as the clear winner for this award. It's Pohatu. Guy may not profess to being as smart as Lee or Choobs, but he sho' nuff does have them creative juices. BEST ARTISTWe had a healthy variety of nominees for this award, from Kevin's lovely hand-drawn art to Choobs' more digital approach, but Elliot's masterful spritework was victorious. (Okay, so Elliot's done hand-drawn art too. So maybe I wanted each of them to represent a different artwork style sue me.) BEST WRITERTouchy subject, here. Several voters who otherwise hit most or all the awards wouldn't go near this one. Understandable, perhaps -- this community prides itself on its writing capability overall, so it can be risky to choose a winner. Such risks are the burden of an awards show host, though, so I'll go ahead and announce that the winner is Pohatu by a narrow margin. HANDSOMEST MEMBERI really thought Wowposter had a shot with this one, but alas. LOVELIEST MEMBERThis award was really meant to be the female equivalent to Handsomest Member, but male nominees are always welcome as jokes. Sadly, I must extend my condolences to Bulbs and Elliot, for although they were both supported in the votes, an actual girl ran away with this one. SV, it's all yours! BEST ROLE MODELEasy winner in this award, taking most of the votes by a long shot. He's a paragon of virtue, etiquette and forum participation -- when he has internet access, anyway. Let's have a big hand for our resident Eagle Scout, Lee! MOST IMPROVED MEMBERPlenty of good nominees here. People like Bub@ and V101, who used to be mere shadowy presences since the fall of Pokeschool, have come out of the woodwork this year and asserted themselves as important and beloved community members. I'd happily give this award to any of the nominees, but there was a definite winner when the votes rolled in and that is Prime. Whattaguy. MOST MISSED MEMBERVery little consensus on this award. Just about everyone who'd been nominated received at least one vote, and there were a lot of nominees to begin with. Still, I think the guy who won this award by the skin of his teeth is a good choice. Here's to Kazkame, not seen in about two and a half months. Hope the college process goes well for you, buddy -- we're all hoping you'll find time for Archie Exie again soon. BEST COUPLENow here's a surprise: a tie. I found dead even support from both the Choobs/Lee/Pohatu and the SV/Pohatu/V101 camps. I could have called a tiebreaker vote or even just chosen the winner myself, but the former would have delayed the proceedings and as for the latter -- how can I bring myself to choose between these two beautiful relationships? No. I had to settle on a compromise. BEST TWO-MINUTE MEMBERAsk and ye shall receive. He wanted it, and he got it. Plenty of nominees were favored here -- including Misty whom I don't even remember ever showing her face around Archie Exie; someone must remind me -- but the winner is our cherished Hatedairies. Um, Hatediaries. ... Dietaries? BIGGEST PENISAnd boy, speaking of ask and ye shall receive, huh? Here was our only award to be the subject of a full-fledged campaign over the course of the month. SV wanted this one, and she fought for it. And, of course, she won by virtually unanimous consent. I'm pleased to wrap up the People's Choice Awards by handing off the Mantle of Mass, the Title of Tonnage, the Gold Star of Girth, to SV.
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Post by Hamuu on Dec 26, 2008 13:36:16 GMT -5
Wow, I really wasn't expecting to win anything. Kinda surprised that it was Wisest Member. Uhm, thanks to everyone who voted for me.
In all truth I am boggled that I got wisest member of all things. Looks like I will have a good level of self esteem today.
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Post by V101 on Dec 26, 2008 13:55:59 GMT -5
totes def! duh
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Post by Yoshimitsu on Dec 26, 2008 14:53:15 GMT -5
Wahey! SV won biggest penis! Though I deserve full credit for that, as I made her want that award and nominated her for it. And voted.
And, y'know, cheers for the art award.
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Post by ch00beh on Dec 26, 2008 15:16:15 GMT -5
you're all faces.
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Post by Beelzebibble on Dec 26, 2008 15:20:15 GMT -5
What disappoints you, Choobs?
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Post by ch00beh on Dec 26, 2008 15:37:43 GMT -5
I felt like I needed to say something off-kilter to accept my award.
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Post by V101 on Dec 26, 2008 17:00:45 GMT -5
o i just looked and saw you encouraged people to give acceptance speeches
uhhh
thanks dudes. i'm guessing only like six people voted, so i'm glad at least two or three of you think i'm cool. self esteem +++
east coast forevs!
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Post by Beelzebibble on Dec 26, 2008 17:28:48 GMT -5
At least twelve people voted overall -- I think it was an even twelve. I won't say how many people voted you for Coolest, but it was more than six.
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Post by V101 on Dec 26, 2008 17:57:14 GMT -5
woo! spicy
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Post by Yoshimitsu on Dec 26, 2008 18:06:44 GMT -5
Wait, people voted for me ironically, right?
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Post by Beelzebibble on Dec 26, 2008 18:55:07 GMT -5
Hard to say. No one made use of the sarcasm color.
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Post by Albatross Trevelyan on Dec 26, 2008 19:38:52 GMT -5
Congrats winners!!!
Wow, big congrats for pohatufan for putting this all together! yaya
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SV
Friendliest Member of ALL TIME
The Friendliest Member Of ALL TIME
Posts: 2,250
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Post by SV on Dec 26, 2008 21:53:07 GMT -5
^ I'm pretty sure this means we're all winners. Haha. Anyway. You guys rock, thanks for voting for me =] I think it's safe to say that I would have never won anything without you all. Please excuse my lame acceptance speech, I have brownies to make.
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Post by Beelzebibble on Dec 27, 2008 15:23:31 GMT -5
THE RAZZIES MOST ANNOYING MEMBERWe start off the Razzies with the Most Annoying Member, which is an appropriate way to begin, because there were about six or seven members who really sweeped the nominations for the Razzies in general and most of them were nominees here. These are Archie Exie's most miserable miscreants! And who more so than the guy who won Most Annoying Member? He's been an admin, he's been banned, and right now he's just a regular Prime, but he'll always be the most cherished thorn in Archie Exie's side. GRUMPIEST MEMBERPossibly mostly out of nostalgia for the good old n00b-flaming days on Pokeschool, and maybe also in recognition of his similar role on Pokecharms, Alex got the most votes in this award. It's true that he is kinda grouchy here on Archie Exie too, but I feel like Elliot, DL and Gil would all have rather claimed this award. Oh well. Since Alex probably won't read this, I trust Elliot to let him know that those kids on Archie Exie think he's a right old curmudgeon. MOST DEPRESSING MEMBEROne of the only Razzies to be an easy victory, Blood takes this award with no trouble. All that talk about having been dead and now no longer being a human -- sheesh! It's enough to make a guy want to go lie down for a while. Not in a coffin. On the couch. STRANGEST MEMBERIt's a one-two punch as Blood runs off with this award as well, although there were certainly lots of deserving nominees for this one (hey there, Bulbs). I guess what swung this in Blood's favor was probably his invention of a language in which the word "katana" is a swear. Don't trust me on this one but I'm guessing if you say the word "claymore" then the Necronians will stop inviting you to their Festivus get-togethers. LEAST DEDICATED MEMBERI know I questioned Alex as Grumpiest Member a little bit, but I also have to take a modest stance against the conferral of the Least Dedicated Member award upon Aurora, because I feel like that kind of misses the point. To be truly undedicated, you have to hang around Archie Exie a fair amount but never actually contribute anything of interest or participate in anything important. You have to be someone who, in other words, is really actively useless. So someone like Rupert! (I jest, I jest.) (No I don't but it's okay because you voted yourself for this award.) Aurora, on the other hand, is just absent. But I guess when he was around he was pretty useless, so okay, I'm cool with it. BIGGEST PROCRASTINATORAh, the Biggest Procrastinator award. And this is exactly when I was going to try to launch into a long boring rambling speech about the award, for thematic consistency, but I find I don't have the inspiration. Anyway, I bet you all -- and especially you RPers -- know who won this award in a landslide. Lee, we affectionately present the Biggest Procrastinator award unto you. It's your own ditch of overcommitment you're digging, my friend. Now go post in the rp. MOST IMPATIENT MEMBERBecause for every procrastinator, there has to be someone snapping at his heels and yapping at him to get to work. Of course, in Lee's case, that someone is half the community (yours truly included), but nearly everyone agrees that Prime is a particular expert at the snapping and the yapping. Take the award, Prime. Take it already! WORST ROLE MODELJust as the forum must have a Best Role Model whose behavior sets a shining example for the rest of the community, so too must it have a Worst Role Model whose mistakes no one is particularly interested in repeating. Surely not so much for his forum conduct and much more for his lurid tales of IRL boozin' and schmoozin', Rupert lands this award. MOST RUN-DOWN MEMBERIt was the best way I could think of to convey the concept of "the opposite of Most Improved Member." This award goes out to the member who's fallen the farthest from his or her glory days. Choobs, the one to put forth the concept in the first place, was a major contender for this award, but he lost. Perhaps the wild success of that "Dear ch00beh" topic means he's back on the up-and-up. In any case, the real winner is Elliot who has slumped so low that he has become an empty parody of himself! Or maybe not. I was going to write that about whoever won. He'll probably agree though. BIGGEST DRAMA MAGNETAnother one-two punch here, as Elliot bawws his way across the finish line for this award. No doubt the Godzelliot incident was the main driving force behind the votes here -- otherwise, I don't associate a whole lot of drama with Elliot (certainly, at least, not as much as second-placed Lugiasian, who possessed a constant low-level drama undercurrent). On the other hand, there was that time that Elliot wanted the Pope and Ocelot banned over some stupid sh*t they posted in Sinnoh Adventure. MOST INFAMOUS MEMBERFour heavyweights in for this award. Elliot is infamous for the aforementioned Godzelliot incident. Alex is infamous I guess for being a self-professed asshole (excuse me, I meant "arsehole"). Prime is infamous. If you were expecting a reason there you fail to realize that I have to keep these award blurbs relatively short. But perhaps there is no one more infamous than Gil. Some of us hate him plainly and joylessly, but the rest of us love to hate him, because he's just so much fun to hate. His vulgar, incendiary style of attack provides a grotesque entertainment that Archie Exie would be worse off without. Trouble is, Gil just never does manage to stick around for long... MOST LIKELY TO DIE AN UNTIMELY DEATHI think it was always pretty well understood that Rupert was going to win this award, if you look back at the nominations topic. Prime with his violent, martial ways received some support here, but in the end Rupert's reckless sex-drugs-'n'-rock-'n'-roll attitude prevailed. Also, now that I think of it, Rupert does have a suspiciously rich history as a Mafia Member in Archie Exie's games. Something tells me he's gonna end up sleeping with the fishes someday, capisce?
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Post by ch00beh on Dec 27, 2008 15:29:35 GMT -5
I knew I shouldn't have started that topic!
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Post by Beelzebibble on Dec 27, 2008 15:30:42 GMT -5
Oh look, guys, see, he has terrible judgement, how run-down he is! Choobs has slumped so low that he has become an empty parody of himself!
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Post by Hamuu on Dec 27, 2008 16:20:31 GMT -5
Wow, Pohatu you're 29 posts from 4000.
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Post by Beelzebibble on Dec 27, 2008 16:37:16 GMT -5
Ought to try and swing it so that I award the Nobels and conclude the ceremony on my 4000th post.
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Post by {WW}BetaBloodWolf7 on Dec 27, 2008 17:38:19 GMT -5
That would be an excellent way to reach 4000.
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Clicker
Joyeuse Insurgency
Trunk Monkey Thief Retriever
They're more fun airborne.
Posts: 236
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Post by Clicker on Dec 27, 2008 21:28:42 GMT -5
No awards for me... Geez, guys, I think I won the award for most invisible.
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Post by Beelzebibble on Dec 27, 2008 21:50:36 GMT -5
Actually you have an award on the way. And the Razzies are behind us so you know it's gotta be good.
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Post by Tout-Perd on Dec 27, 2008 22:35:24 GMT -5
Thank you all very much. I am indeed pleased to hear that I am now part of a polygamist harem with Photu as the core as opposed to a gay trio. Easier to sit down this way.
Thank you all for voting for me as best Role Model, and for biggest Procrastinator. What's it say that I'm the best role model, and the biggest slacker? (I think Photu woulda beat me on Role Model if he hadn't tried to force sooo many fads.)
Blood will actually wear those Razzies as a badge of Pride. You know it to be true.
And I do think that people mistake charisma and wit for raw intelligence. Really, that's kinda easy to do though. There should have been a "Wittiest" category just to clarify, in retrospect. Because Brainiest is entirely different. (Hey, don't look at me. I voted Choobs, and would have voted Cinders after that. They gots the maths.)
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Post by hermes on Dec 27, 2008 23:24:16 GMT -5
Math is an exercise in logic. You can be very logical without being very smart. My grandmother can do math faster than me, faster than my bloody calculator actually, and I type fast. But, much love and no offense to her, she isn't very bright.
Thank you all for the three wonderful award I now hold. Nice to know I was at least considered for the infamy one. Donno if I deserve the most impatient though. My bugging people is a matter of knowing they won't post if no one says anything. The recent thing with DL being a great example.
As for being the most Improved. I donno if you're talking about me as a person, or my Role Playing, but I have this to say essentially for both.
Whether or not I am attentive of my actions, does not make me a different person. I don't want to be rude now, and I didn't want to be rude in the past. And in a lot of cases I was, yes, an ***hole. I still could be, if I don't keep an eye on myself. I had the capacity to watch myself in the past, and I do now, just because I do more carefully now doesn't make me a different or more improved person.
I am the same person as I will ever be, I don't think any of us really change, so much as we change the way we act. The same mind is still behind the actions, the words, and it always will be. If you grow a new neuron or lose a few, it doesn't really make a difference to who you are. Who you are is fixed, not in perception, but in the ways we think. Just because we can adopt a new perspective doesn't make us different, we could have done so all alone, that was always part of us, and it is simply now that we have decided to do so.
That decision and potential was also there, simply another part of us. Maybe we are unaware, and don't completely understand ourselves, but we ourselves never really change. We can understand how we act, and why we act that way, but the same force always drives it.
As for my Rp....I though I'd been rather rusty lately, am I mistaken?
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Post by Beelzebibble on Dec 27, 2008 23:41:53 GMT -5
Most Improved RPer is a separate award. That's for the Oscars, the day after tomorrow.
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Post by Beelzebibble on Dec 28, 2008 12:41:54 GMT -5
THE PULITZERS BEST POSTThe Pulitzers recognize a variety of forum-related accomplishments, of which the most basic is naturally Best Post. There were plenty of memorable nominees -- you can revisit them through the links in the nominations topic, if you need to -- but the winner is, well, one of mine. Seems there was a good bit of support for Rhometer bends space and time in the superplay fight ( link). Nice work there, Rhorho. BEST TOPICMaybe it had to be so. Maybe The Topic Wherein You Prove You Are Not A Spambot ( link) had to take Best Topic. I mean, the picture thread is easily our most epic topic -- for length, if not necessarily for content, although many would call the content pretty damn epic too. Camwhores of Archie Exie, we salute you. BEST BOARDThe only thing I have to say about this one is that at least one member who voted for The Coffee Table isn't and has never been a staff member. Draw your own conclusions. BEST FICInterestingly, the most recent and the shortest of all fics nominated for this award ended up the victor. The still-not-exactly-titled Unreliable Narrator Story ( link) scraped this one by a narrow margin. Or did it? [Editor's note: Yes, it did.]BEST IMAGEWe few. We happy few. We band of brothers. The Battle at Camel-ot ( link) took no prisoners. BEST AVATARThe Choobs and Rupert supporters had nothin' on the SV crowd, who've evidently been brainwashed by how damn adorable that little Vaporeon is. Take another award, SV. BEST SIGNATUREA shamelessly suggestive banner campaigning for Biggest Penis '08 and a quote from a post by yours truly... how can you go wrong with that combination? One more award for SV. (I still think my Djkates quote is funnier than her Pohatu quote, though.) BEST ALTERNATE NAMEAh, the alternate name. Archie Exie members have a deep-rooted habit of changing their screen names, whether for an interesting change of pace ( Kirabi), to serve the purposes of a joke ( Who), or even to reflect a complete change of persona ( Pohatler). I was endlessly amused to see that Rupert Lulz was the easy winner for this award -- but also kind of surprised, as it's something of an in-joke. To appreciate the humor, you have to know Rupert's last name, which I guess necessitates being his Facebook friend because I don't think he's ever mentioned it here. (Hint: It rhymes with "putz".) Sadly, Rupert himself changed his name back to Krazy Glue as soon as he discovered the trick, claiming to officially hate whoever was responsible. I can't really blame him, though. Guy must have been a total douche. BEST SKINJust about all the nominees were supported here -- there's no accounting for taste -- but the narrow victory goes to Machine, the magnum opus of Archie Exie's most devoted skinmaker. Choobs, it's all yours. BEST FADThe business of recognizing, documenting and propagating fads is itself a fad on Archie Exie ever since the creation of the wiki, and with good reason. Fads mean laughter and joy for all. But far from laughter and joy, I watched the votes roll in for this award with nothing less than a kind of dim horror. Guys... MAGIKARP RAIN won. MAGIKARP RAIN won. There is something deeply wrong here. I thought no one except me and to some degree Lee and Bulbs liked this fad. I thought the community as a whole frowned upon this, Archie Exie's most forced meme. This is astonishing. And deeply unsettling. WHAT HATH POHATU WROUGHT?! (And for the record, I did not vote for MAGIKARP RAIN. I voted for keep the exodus X.) BEST POSTING GAMEAn easy win here. Insult the person above you in a rhyming couplet ( link) has clearly earned its title as Archie Exie's classiest posting game, and it deserved nothing less. Take that, Count to a Million! MOST HOUSE SPIRITI can hear Alryst sharpening their scimitars now, Ulaich taking up their cudgels, Vashval loading the rifles that they would use if Vashval actually existed. So I'll go ahead and hand this off to a non-Oloysian. Blood, it's yours. Good going, buddy. Keep on fighting for Great House Ulaich -- because I think you're the only one at it these days. OLOYLOYLOYLOY!BEST WIKI ARTICLEHuh. The Coffee Table ( link) won. Well, it's a pretty neat little piece of work, I guess. Hmm now what does this remind me to say. Oh yeah. Make some more friggin' pages youse guys. BEST EVENTThree good nominees here from the past year. The Wolves dominating SPAM v.1 created one of Archie Exie's most jaw-droppingly huge threads and established Blood and Lonewolf as members. The Exodus Rundown along with its spin-off series The Exodite Rundown caused no end of delightful banter and catfights. But no event gripped Archie Exie more than the Sniflish Invasion. Truly, the forum has never experienced anything quite like it. Whether or not that's a good thing you are all now free to debate. BEST NEW BOARD CONCEPTInterestingly, the winner for this award is a concept that can almost certainly never be actually realized and executed. But Super Smash Bros. Archie Exie is the favorite concept anyway, what with all the enthusiastic discussion and spinoff topics that it generated this summer, of everything from characters to stages to items. That's a success even without the actual game. So, SSB Archie Exie, here's to you. Keep the dream alive, guys. If the hackers ever find a way to make mods for the Wii... BEST SPAMBOTAlthough Lee and V101 put up a good fight -- the latter in spite of the fact that she vehemently denies spambot status -- how could they best Blood? His penchant for insubstantial and inconsequential posts such as "Loverly", his Scrap Heap scavenging so blatant it would make even Lee hang his head in shame, and his suspiciously vocal refusal for the longest time to post a picture of himself in The Topic Wherein You Prove You Are Not A Spambot -- all point to only one conclusion. Blood is the best spambot on Archie Exie. Step aside, Wowposter. There's nothing for you here.
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