Fleetwolf
Joyeuse Insurgency
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Post by Fleetwolf on May 7, 2011 17:56:28 GMT -5
Well. There's the ceiling, the door, the curtains on the door, a large cabinet with cereal boxes on top, an old washboard with a plastic vine hanging on it, and a dog leash hanging on a fishing rod holder.
Turn to your left, walk as far as you can without intersecting any sort of object, and look right.
EDIT: I think it would make this thread even cooler if, after you've stated what you have found as your zombie-slaying weapon, you make a short paragraph about how you would use it to kill a zombie. That would make it more interesting than just saying "Chair. Look left." Or something.
Soo...
*grabs the washboard and smacks the zombie over the head, thus denting the the weapon. The curtains are ripped from the rod and tied around the zombie's mouth in an attempt to gag it and prevent it from biting. The plastic vine is tied around its arms. More beating with the washboard ensues.*
Something like that. (Up to you Shroud since you started this topic)
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Post by Shrouded Wolf on May 9, 2011 4:29:04 GMT -5
Actually, I was thinking of doing something like that myself, but you beat me to the suggestion. Awesome idea.
A mirror...huh. *Tries to detach the mirror from the wall, but after seeing it's fastened very well. Then takes my shoe and shatters the mirror. Carefully picks off some of the mirror shards off of the wall, and ducks down behind the far bed as the zombies crash in. As they storm past me, throws a few shards at the wall to distract them, then rushes up to them with their backs turned with glass shards in each hand and tries to stab them in tjhe back*
Look left and go around the farthest corer you can see. Look straight ahead.
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Fleetwolf
Joyeuse Insurgency
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Post by Fleetwolf on Jun 12, 2011 19:53:04 GMT -5
A tall lamp, the kind that stands on the floor. *grabs the lamp and ducks behind the nearby couch, keeping an eye on the window as well as the entrances to the living room. Uses the metal rod of the lamp to try and hit zombies in the head with, as well as attempting to smack, trip, or tie them up with the cord. Also detaches the lampshade to use as a temporary shield, and throws the lightbulb at them*
Spin around, then look straight ahead. Now look up, just a little. What is it and how will you use it to defend yourself from the invading zombies?
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Post by Yoshimitsu on Jun 12, 2011 20:51:41 GMT -5
Shelves, with various PS2 and Wii games, a bunch of deodorants, a box of bits and pieces, two dissidia figures and a birthday card.
I'll throw them all at zombies while I flee.
Without looking, grab something in front of you. What is it and how will you use it against zombies?
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Post by ch00beh on Jun 13, 2011 18:35:49 GMT -5
wouldn't that just be your computer for everyone looking at this page.
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Post by Ninety on Jun 15, 2011 11:29:33 GMT -5
Well, my gun is in front of my laptop sooo...
I would use my gun to shoot zeds in the head.
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Post by ch00beh on Jun 22, 2011 0:23:22 GMT -5
my laptop is still in front of me.
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Prime
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Post by Prime on Jun 22, 2011 1:38:36 GMT -5
A lighter and a bottle of lighter fluid are in front of me....I grab them and transform them into a flamethrower, and set the zombies clothing on fire.
You jump out the window and run to the left, grabbing the first object you see. What is it and how will you use it against the zombie horde?
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Post by Yoshimitsu on Jun 22, 2011 8:11:50 GMT -5
Cigarette butts. Um... I'll throw them in the eyes of the zombies and run away some more.
Open a drawer, then grab something from it without looking. What is it and how will you use it?
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Post by Ninety on Jun 22, 2011 11:01:09 GMT -5
If I jump out my window and turn to the left the first thing I see is my truck.
I would get in my truck and squish zeds.
EDIT: Oh I didn't see that El had switched things up.
I opened the drawer and found a KA-BAR combat knife.
I would use it to stab zeds in the head.
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Prime
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Post by Prime on Jun 22, 2011 20:48:28 GMT -5
We should ban ninety, he's terrible for continuity.
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Post by Ninety on Jun 23, 2011 8:22:01 GMT -5
I prefer answering to asking.
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Prime
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Post by Prime on Jun 24, 2011 8:29:49 GMT -5
Are you single too?
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Post by Ninety on Jun 24, 2011 18:25:56 GMT -5
Of course.
Grab something from your pockets. How will it defend you from the zeds?
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Post by Krazy Glue on Jul 14, 2011 15:16:45 GMT -5
There will never be a zombie apocalypse.
If you think there is even a remote chance then you're officially retarded.
Zombies are the worst supernatural villans ever.
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Post by {WW}BetaBloodWolf7 on Jul 14, 2011 23:26:42 GMT -5
There will never be a zombie apocalypse. If you think there is even a remote chance then you're officially retarded. Zombies are the worst supernatural villans ever. Even worse than Twilight "vampires"?
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Prime
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Post by Prime on Jul 14, 2011 23:42:57 GMT -5
There will never be a zombie apocalypse. If you think there is even a remote chance then you're officially retarded. Zombies are the worst supernatural villans ever. First statement, true. Second statement follows the first, depending on your interpretation of what a zombie is. An outbreak of a virus or bacteria that effects the rational portion of the human brain could easily cause mass cannibalism or mass hysteria leading to it. Final statement....Are you stupid? Sure they're slow and they shuffle around, but every person they catch adds to their armada. Numbers are a proven advantage, and numbers have proven themselves for a long ass time. Numbers that increase based on how many of YOU they manage to kill is even worse. A traditional vampire might be terrifying to the individual, or a small group. But you hit that fucker with a grenade launcher and I'm pretty sure it'll still be a couple hundred pieces. The same solution works with a zombie, only it exists only to eat and propogate the endless horde. Zombies are seriously bad news dude, I have no idea what you're thinking.
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Post by Krazy Glue on Jul 15, 2011 6:36:20 GMT -5
I'm thinking rationally, zombies just suck, they can't do a thing. They're just such a shit villain. Unless you're reanimating corpses through a mystical means, ergo they could be smashed into millions of pieces and still reconstitute due to magic and kill you, zombies are shit. Virus/Bacteria that makes people only use their raw instincts and shuts off the rational portion of their brain. Possible, but essentially you're talking about levels of intoxication akin to PCP mixed with lots of alcohol. The body needs so much energy to keep it in that state, chances are the average person is going to die within hours of becoming infected. Unless the virus grants them constant energy, at which point they wouldn't need to keep eating people. Also, biting is a terrible way of spreading a virus, an airborne virus that affected people would mean that the government would quarantine the areas then drop a bomb on them to destroy all the "zombies" problem solved. Guaranteed, a virus akin to a "zombie virus" were to break out, unless someone got on a plane with it, the whole area would be decimated within a day. Oh and the whole "every person they bite is added to their armada" bull, humans are so easy to apprehend, and in the case of zombies, even more so. A couple of decent cuts to the tendons on the back and a person is practically paralyzed. Frankly, I've got enough weaponry in my house that I could easily take out over 1000 "zombies" before having to worry about ammo and switch to knives and swords, which would be more fun, especially with how shit zombies are at defending themselves, even if they were shuffling towards me at top speed, severing their heads from their spines would be so easy with my dadao, I'd just stand around laughing my head off saying "And people actually thought this'd be a problem, what complete idiots" Oh and if you're still sitting there going "but zombies.... they can bite you! They're a really good villain, I just opened a small sewage plant in my trousers thinking about how scary it would be if zombies happened" first, take your head out your ass and smell the fresh air, it's rational in the real world. Second: www.cracked.com/article_18683_7-scientific-reasons-zombie-outbreak-would-fail-quickly.html/ Third go fuck yourself memeprime.
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Prime
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Post by Prime on Jul 15, 2011 6:53:25 GMT -5
I had a pretty well written response to that, but I changed my mind. The summary is pretty concise though.
Swords are dope, zombies are slow, solar electricity is good, go fuck yourself.
EDIT - Zombies are a seriously boring villain btw, I never said they were good. Why are you bringing this up? Vampires using black magic at the head of ghoul and zombie hordes are awesome villains though.
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Post by Beelzebibble on Jul 15, 2011 9:02:00 GMT -5
Frankly, I've got enough weaponry in my house that I could easily take out over 1000 "zombies" before having to worry about ammo and switch to knives and swords, which would be more fun, especially with how shit zombies are at defending themselves, even if they were shuffling towards me at top speed, severing their heads from their spines would be so easy with my dadao, I'd just stand around laughing my head off saying "And people actually thought this'd be a problem, what complete idiots" You have now become a member of the horde. Congratulations. You staved it off for a whole post and a half. Better than some! I'm talking about the horde of people who can't discuss zombies without drifting off into wish-fulfillment fantasies presenting themselves as super badass zombie killing machines. "HRNF OH YEAH HRNF HRNF MY HOUSE IS BASICALLY A FORTRESS HRNF HRNF I'VE GOT GUNS AND AMMO UP THE WAZOO HRNF LIKE LITERALLY STORED DIRECTLY UP MY ASSHOLE HRNF HRNF HRNF AND WHEN IT COMES TO SWORDS HRNF GIVE ME A BREAK HRNF HRNF I MIGHT AS WELL HAVE ESCAPED OFF THE SET OF AN ANG LEE MOVIE HRRRRRRNF HRNF HRNF HRNF FOR THE RECORD I WAS THINKING MORE ALONG THE LINES OF 'CROUCHING TIGER, HIDDEN DRAGON' THERE, NOT SO MUCH 'BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN' HRNF HRNF" That's you, now. You're one of them. Oh well. You had a good run while it lasted. P.S. zombies are stupid
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Post by The Evil Biscuit on Jul 15, 2011 11:11:10 GMT -5
zombies are awesome
you shut up
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Post by ch00beh on Jul 15, 2011 12:39:41 GMT -5
zombie are interesting because it's like "yo, it would suck to be infected and feel your brain slowly degenerating into madness" or "yo, my best buddy is infected, so I guess I gotta kill him."
the psychological potential is like a billion times better than the visceral indulgence.
although visceral indulgence is ok too.
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Prime
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Post by Prime on Jul 16, 2011 8:05:27 GMT -5
^ Also an excellent point, how would you cop with your little 8 year old daughter trying to literally bite your ankles and turn you into one of the horde, to hunt your wife or sons or other daughters, or you mother or something. Could YOU put a cap in little Daniella? Jerk!
Also yeah Swords > Zombies, if you have the room to swing em nothing puts a zombie down like a good blow to the head. Choppy choppy brain.
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Post by Krazy Glue on Jul 19, 2011 8:46:00 GMT -5
Hardly, I know I'm not a complete badass, I was pointing out how stupid it is to even begin to start making plans for a zombie apocalypse when you train in mixed martial arts and spend enough of your life playing with swords, knives, and guns. The mere concept is completely laughable to me hense why I linked you to the cracked article, at least they can turn the completely pathetic concept of "zombies" into an entertaining article to read. The most entertaining part being the amount of people that'l read it and go "oh....... all my plans wasted, if only I had a brain..." Zombies < Kittens
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Post by Ninety on Jul 19, 2011 11:35:53 GMT -5
I seriously doubt that anyone here actually believed a zombie apocalypse is something that could happen. This was just a fun little forum game. If you want, replace every instance of "zombie" with "home intruder" or something like that and it will be much the same thing.
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Post by ch00beh on Jul 19, 2011 12:45:46 GMT -5
you mean santa claus isn't real????????????
D:
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