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Post by Beelzebibble on Oct 28, 2015 11:10:59 GMT -5
Guys, I have some bad news. I was looking up Garth in the search engine and I found this topic from September 2006. If you read the last post carefully, you'll notice that Prime forgot his closing quotation mark. That means that everything that's been posted in ORP since 2006 has not actually happened. It's just been a long, long series of stories that Vanos has been telling Aurora while they've been dodging Walmart-sized chunks of molten rock thrown around by, I'm just gonna say it, the real Garth. I am so, so sorry to inform you all that our years of hard work, creative effort, and pimping our characters in popularity polls have been for nothing. You will notice that the title of this topic is a double apostrophe. I have finally closed Prime's quotation. At long last, this waking fever dream has come to an end. Let us go now and carry on the great continuity of ORP as it truly stands. I would like to introduce my new character, Supreme. He likes swords and can turn into a dragon and shoot energy out of his mouth (as a dude, not as a dragon). There will be five fight topics a day. I'll see you in the RP.
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Post by ch00beh on Oct 28, 2015 12:34:35 GMT -5
aww yiss ender is still alive
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Post by Tout-Perd on Oct 28, 2015 22:40:56 GMT -5
I adore how "Garth" is a topic that keeps turning up every three years or so, like a bad penny. Also, this prompts me to share this, which to this day has only been shown to SV and the staff: "I gave up on it and decided to shower before school..." His hand went to the buttons towards the waist of his shirt, and began unfastening them awkwardly. "So, I go to get undressed, and I have... THIS." He jerked the light fabric of his shirt aside, "Dear god! Garth is huge!!!" Vanos yelled, thinking he might've gotten himself into just a tiny bit of trouble. "In rediu enratos nien yo a'kthor reim lo garndos iem caan." Vanos chanted. His size slowly began to increase. He was still much smaller than Garth, but this certainly gave him a far better chance against the beast. "I'm in." Garth said, "If you don't mind." Vanos cursed. "Ouh, that's what I get for using that spell." He whispered. Vanos flinched, covering his ears. "Damn, that hurts." "I'm very sorry about that..." Garth responded, his apologetic voice almost a whimper. "I just gained the ability to perform that... um... so I can't really contain its power yet."
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Oct 28, 2015 23:06:20 GMT -5
Post by SHADOWMASTER89 on Oct 28, 2015 23:06:20 GMT -5
...and whatever happened to this being a "family friendly" site?
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Oct 29, 2015 11:45:09 GMT -5
Post by Tout-Perd on Oct 29, 2015 11:45:09 GMT -5
You mostly came after Prime's heyday, so you haven't experienced how... sexually repressed a lot of his posts sound. Phallic swords everywhere, shooting creamy colored energy blasts from the tip, spontaneous character nudity, and so on and so forth. There was also a gratuitous guy masturbating on the subway, a gratuitous nude twelve year old girl, and multiple demonic rapes in his posts. I'm pretty sure we have an archive of his most... unfortunate statements, including one fight scene post that if removed from context, sounds completely like a sex scene. So the forums have a bit of tradition of quoting his posts out of context, because things can get... quite accidentally hilarious.
As for the stuff with Garth, if you look at the actual context of the posts in Triannual, yeah, I deliberately drew a lot of parallels between his Power and puberty, and how it awkwardly throws you into a completely different world, regardless of if you want it to or not. (In Triannual proper, he pulls up his shirt to reveal a mystic brand on his stomach, btw.) It's arguable that it's the undercurrent of the entire RP, with both Terrian and Garth hesitant to deal with this new life presented for them, but eventually deciding to proactively make new lives for themselves on their own terms. So yeah, veiled coming of age narrative there.
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Oct 29, 2015 12:06:33 GMT -5
via mobile
Post by AngelicTragedy on Oct 29, 2015 12:06:33 GMT -5
You forgot to explain why the word 'azure' is now both cringeworthy and humorous.
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Oct 29, 2015 13:38:33 GMT -5
Post by Beelzebibble on Oct 29, 2015 13:38:33 GMT -5
I'm pretty sure we have an archive of his most... unfortunate statements Yeah, it's called SV's signature.
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Oct 29, 2015 22:21:22 GMT -5
Post by ch00beh on Oct 29, 2015 22:21:22 GMT -5
butts
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SV
Friendliest Member of ALL TIME
The Friendliest Member Of ALL TIME
Posts: 2,250
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Nov 4, 2015 17:58:22 GMT -5
Post by SV on Nov 4, 2015 17:58:22 GMT -5
I'm pretty sure we have an archive of his most... unfortunate statements Yeah, it's called SV's signature. Such is my service to the people.
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Nov 5, 2015 12:50:39 GMT -5
ch00beh likes this
Post by ch00beh on Nov 5, 2015 12:50:39 GMT -5
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Nov 5, 2015 13:19:57 GMT -5
Post by Tout-Perd on Nov 5, 2015 13:19:57 GMT -5
If brevity is the soul of wit, then Choobs must be the god of humor! (I think I need to make a philosoraptor meme now.)
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Nov 6, 2015 18:06:50 GMT -5
Post by Yoshimitsu on Nov 6, 2015 18:06:50 GMT -5
You mostly came after Prime's heyday, so you haven't experienced how... sexually repressed a lot of his posts sound. Phallic swords everywhere, shooting creamy colored energy blasts from the tip, spontaneous character nudity, and so on and so forth. There was also a gratuitous guy masturbating on the subway, a gratuitous nude twelve year old girl, and multiple demonic rapes in his posts. I'm pretty sure we have an archive of his most... unfortunate statements, including one fight scene post that if removed from context, sounds completely like a sex scene. So the forums have a bit of tradition of quoting his posts out of context, because things can get... quite accidentally hilarious. I'm not sure if I missed all of this or just purposefully blocked it out. The strongest contender for Prime thoughts was he asked me and... Aurora I think it was, what side sword should his character have: smallest, smaller, small, normal, big, bigger, biggest. I think me and Aurora both said big, and he turned up in the next post with a sword that was five foot wide and twenty foot long. (Yeah I used to be bros with Prime and Aurora)
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Nov 6, 2015 18:10:55 GMT -5
Post by Tout-Perd on Nov 6, 2015 18:10:55 GMT -5
And don't forget, it was made out of a neutron star, too. So technically it weighed like... More than earth? At least had to have the mass of a continent in there.
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Nov 6, 2015 18:13:49 GMT -5
Post by Yoshimitsu on Nov 6, 2015 18:13:49 GMT -5
Also whenever he swung it, it resulted in explosions
Was I like, 12 or something when all this Prime stuff happened? Did I just continuously miss the subcontext? This is embarassing
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SV
Friendliest Member of ALL TIME
The Friendliest Member Of ALL TIME
Posts: 2,250
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Nov 8, 2015 0:39:28 GMT -5
Post by SV on Nov 8, 2015 0:39:28 GMT -5
I'm mostly certain that most/all of Prime's shenanigans transpired on Exy. Mostly when I was inactive, but not completely. There was enough overlap that I can no longer take the word azure seriously and may never do so again.
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Nov 8, 2015 14:55:03 GMT -5
Post by ch00beh on Nov 8, 2015 14:55:03 GMT -5
it's funny because i interview a lot of people from microsoft who worked on or use Azure the product daily and i have to stop myself from giggling in their face
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