|
Post by Beelzebibble on Mar 11, 2011 19:54:03 GMT -5
===-==>
HOW CAN YOU POSSIBLY EXPRESS YOUR RAGE RIGHT NOW
LET US COUNT THE WAYS.
1. SHOOPS 2. THERE IS NO 2
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Mar 11, 2011 19:55:38 GMT -5
> Flynn: Shoop.
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Mar 11, 2011 19:55:53 GMT -5
===-==>Munch on that, Whiteherp. "Oh bluh bluh oh Bicé's messaging me! Bluh now I'll go talk to her bluh bluh herp derp I wonder if she loves me I wonder if that's what this means!" Whiteherp. It is time for a big fat reality check. She's not interested. The only man what's man enough for Bicé is this kid over here, so you can go ahead and step right the fuck off. Hey, guess who's an expert in stepping off? Rohr! Rohr will show you how it works. It's very simple, Whiteherp, so simple even you could probably figure out the underlying principles at work. You just take a little STEP backwards and then you are OFF. Totally gonna post this on the message board. He will be mortified. You are truly the duke of shoop. Hey look, someone else is pestering you! No wait, that's just your battery. Aw fuck! Shooping that picture took a real toll on your LAPTOP's remaining power. You better go charge this bad boy up. And god damn it, you also need to start playing Sburb. Who knows?? She could be making arrangements to replace you with that deathly-pale basement-dweller! OH HELL NO. Your course of action is clear.
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Mar 11, 2011 19:56:27 GMT -5
> Flynn: Curse your lack of handheld communications device.
Oh.
Oh yeah, you go pick up the PORTABLE too. Yeah, and stash it away in one of your pockets. No need to use a SYLLADEX slot for something so small and well portable.
We're okay with there not being an image depicting this action. It would've been boring.
Now let's go back into the house.
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Mar 11, 2011 19:56:41 GMT -5
> Flynn: Go back into the house.You're trying! The FRONT DOOR is locked, and you forgot to take your KEYS when you left your BEDROOM. come ON
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Mar 11, 2011 19:57:03 GMT -5
> Flynn: LOUSY GODDAMN STUPIDWhat. You're just locked out temporarily. Kinda sucks, but it's not as though you're never getting back inside the house. What's the big deal? We all need to settle down here.
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Mar 11, 2011 19:57:26 GMT -5
> Flynn: Ring doorbell.
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Mar 11, 2011 19:57:36 GMT -5
===-==>
Yeah, there's pretty much no way the doorbell wasn't going to sound like that.
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Apr 1, 2011 23:24:04 GMT -5
> Flynn: Rip out the doorbell in a fit of rage.No... No, you won't be doing that.You've got bigger fish to fry right now. No need to waste time getting all histrionic about a setback like this when you aren't really feeling it a hundred percent. If you were to rip out the doorbell in a fit of rage, there honestly wouldn't be any particular motivation there except to be IRONIC. And you hate irony. Irony is a supremely easy, low-risk game for chumps to play, the refuge of LAME COOLKID POSERS and HIPSTER DOUCHEBAGS who wouldn't know a genuine emotion if it kicked them in the teeth. Indeed, the only reasons you would ever damage anything on these premises would be either (a) by accident, like when you stabbed that BOOK OF SHEET MUSIC earlier, or (b) because you truly felt in your heart of hearts that it was the right thing to do at that moment, like when you did that thing that you're going to be doing quite soon. You know, that thing with the breaking and the severing! What? You know, the... Oh, forget it.
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Apr 1, 2011 23:29:19 GMT -5
> Flynn: Use the side entrance.Also locked! Bummer, huh?? Wow. Huge bummer. No, everything's still okay. You're still not screwed yet. But maybe it would behoove you to use the last of your computer's power to get in touch with Bice and just let her know the deal, especially considering -- wait! Fock! Oh god! Is she okay?? You'd forgotten what Whiteherp said about that meteor! Bice's house could've been wiped off the map by now!!
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Apr 1, 2011 23:31:05 GMT -5
> Flynn: Report to client player, POSTHASTE.-- forteHolder [FH] began pestering delphicVoyager [DV] --
FH: /heɪ ʌm/ FH: I kinda need an extension. Is that okay? FH: Got to find my charger before I load the game up. I'm on my last legs over here! DV: Uh, sure DV: It's fine, just let me know when you get situated.
forteHolder [FH] is offline.
forteHolder [FH] is online.
FH: /fʌkɪŋ/ FH: Sorry! My computer keeps blacking out on me. FH: It's really
forteHolder [FH] is offline.
forteHolder [FH] is online.
FH: Augh /sɒri/ /sɒri/ !! FH: Hey but listen, are you okay where you are? Like, I mean, there isn't a meteor bearing down on your house or anything, right?? DV: Meteors, huh? DV: You know I was wondering what that was.
forteHolder [FH] is offline.
forteHolder [FH] is online.
forteHolder [FH] is offline.
forteHolder [FH] is online.
FH: Oh my god are you telling the truth?? FH: Shit shit shit shit shit!! DV: Woah DV: You're being serious, aren't you? DV: I was actually joking so uh. DV: What's this about a meteor?
forteHolder [FH] is offline.
DV: Actually DV: Don't worry about answering that, go find your charger, if I keep watching your pesterchum icon keep flashing on and off I'm going to become epileptic.
forteHolder [FH] is online.
FH: Oh man okay /ʰwyu/ FH: You had me going for a minute there. Ha ha! FH: I was really / / FH: All right never mind I'm gonna get this started on the reals now. I swear it won't be long. A minute maybe. One minute and twenty-one seconds /tɒps/. FH: But listen, I'm not kidding, if there turns out to be like a meteor or a tornado or like, a cascade of lava coming your way and I'm not back yet... don't wait for me, okay? Ask someone else to be your server. Okay?? I mean it. Forget about me! DV: Flynn you're freaking me out a little. DV: But I'll ah, keep that in mind. DV: I'm counting on you not to bail on me maaaang, DV: So go do your thing. FH: Got it! Back in a flash.
forteHolder [FH] is offline.
forteHolder [FH] is online.
FH: /sɒri/ !!!
-- forteHolder [FH] ceased pestering delphicVoyager [DV] --
forteHolder [FH] is offline.
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Apr 1, 2011 23:34:37 GMT -5
===-==>
All right. Okay. Breathe. She's good. You're good.
You didn't want it to come to this, but there's no other way of getting back into the house. And lives are at stake here.
*
SYLLADEX (PRIORITY MODUS) [1 Gasgano minifig] [2 Actors & Programmers Monthly] [3 ----] [4 ----] [5 ----] [6 Sburb beta] [7 hole-punched sheet music] [8 laptop] STRIFE PORTFOLIO: rapierKind {foil}
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Apr 1, 2011 23:35:12 GMT -5
> Flynn: Use the entrance around back.
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Apr 1, 2011 23:42:01 GMT -5
===-==>Hmm. Doesn't look like she's hosting a gig here today. All closed up. Just your luck. The one day that you actually wouldn't be averse to her staging one of her big noisy shows and inviting the whole city to attend, she's taking it easy. Well, there it went: that was pretty much your last hope. It's over. Whiteherp will take over as Bice's server and save her from the meteors, and then sloppy makeouts will ensue. Meanwhile, you will languish out here with this useless hunk of plastic which used to be known as your computer, gnawing at pages of sheet music and lamenting your fate, until such time as your own meteor arrives to deliver your molten demise. Unless...
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Apr 1, 2011 23:42:44 GMT -5
===-==>You wonder if you can just... Just sort of reach down... And...
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Apr 1, 2011 23:43:41 GMT -5
===-==>
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Apr 14, 2011 0:52:51 GMT -5
===-==>
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Apr 14, 2011 0:54:13 GMT -5
===-==>Well good. She's definitely not here. That's a relief. You'd hate to like run into her and have it turn into this whole thing and like, wind up STRIFING with her again. How fortunate that you are to be spared this encounter, and that you will be allowed to proceed immediately back into the main section of the house and locate your CHARGER so as to restore your LAPTOP to full health whereupon you will be able to load the SERVER DISC and start playing SBURB. What a great plan. How straightforward. It's good that things are scheduled to be so straightforward because after all there are lives on the line here and you can't afford to waste even a second of time. Bicé's fate could depend on it. Great! Sooooo anyway, if we were expecting a STRIFE right around now, we should probably accept the fact that that's not happening. Not only was it unlikely in the first place since your SISTER plainly isn't here, but now that we've made this whole to-do about it in the narrative, springing a STRIFE at this point would just be a ridiculously contrived PSYCHE move. Like, we get it. A STRIFE animation is being really heavily foreshadowed here through reverse psychology. We gathered that. How obvious and boring would it be to turn around and say " OH SNAP GUESS WHAT STRIFE PAGE"?? So obvious! So boring. And no, that was not a reverse-psychology cue for a STRIFE page, as we can clearly tell from the fact that one isn't happening right now. This is all getting to be absurdly META in the worst, most annoying way, and it's high time you go right on ahead back to your BEDROOM and fetch that SISTER: CQME QNE CQME ALL !!!!
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Apr 14, 2011 0:54:33 GMT -5
===-==>SISTER: For an afternoon of FUN! EXCITEMENT! SISTER: GQQD QLD -> CIRCUS MAGIC !!!! <- FLYNN: /oʊ maɪ gɒ/ SISTER: Featurinq breathtakinq performances by: SISTER: JUGGLERS[/u][/color] SISTER: CQNTQRTIQNISTS[/u][/color] FLYNN: /pliz/SISTER: AERIAL SILK ACRQBATS[/u][/color] FLYNN: Do we /hæf/ to go through all this right now??SISTER: TIGHTRQPE WALKERS[/u][/color] SISTER: And alsoSISTER: -> SQME KID <- Who dares presume that just because he's fiqured out how to hold a rapier the riqht way forward[/color] [/size] HE MUST BE SQME KIND QF ! GQD DAMNED HQTSHQT ! !!!![/color] FLYNN: No no, okay, you've got it wrong, I was just passing through cause I was locked out! I didn't have my keys on me when I went outside. FLYNN: I'm not trying to infringe upon your territory or whatever! I just need to get back to my room. Okay?? FLYNN: Christ, is this seriously what's happening right now? Are we going with this?SISTER: S-T-I-C-K - A-R-Q-U-N-D !![/i][/color] SISTER: THERE'LL BE LAUGHS !SISTER: THERE'LL BE THRILLS !SISTER: There miqht possibly even be !! BLQQD. !!SISTER: And now, ladies and qentlemen,[/font][/b]
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Apr 20, 2011 22:10:16 GMT -5
> Flynn: STRIFE STRIFE STRIFE STRIFE STRIFE
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Jun 9, 2011 15:55:38 GMT -5
===-==>Presently it dawns on you that cleaving your SISTER's tightrope in twain is probably not going to win you any awards in the "showing support for her interests no matter your feelings about them because &c. &c. &c." category. But hey, she was the one who started the fight. Maybe if she'd ever stop bellowing POSTER-READY CATCHPHRASES at full blast and let you get a word in edgewise, she'd figure out that passing meekly through this CIRCUS TENT, which she constructed as an addition to the house years ago, does not qualify as an aggressive act. In the meantime, it's not like she can't just string a new wire up there! She's dealt with setbacks like this before. Usually because of her own incompetence mind you. Never held her down. She has basically got to tip on that tightrope.
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Jun 9, 2011 16:09:22 GMT -5
> Flynn: Ponder the whereabouts of the the various items thrown at you during your skirmish.They're over here. Now we're talking. This loot is pretty much totally yours. She can't very well throw stuff at you and not expect to relinquish its ownership. No NINJA ever asked for his SHURIKEN back after sending it spinning headlong into someone's jugular vein. Well, okay, that's cause the ninja could just stalk up and pluck it back out of the dude's erupted neck. But -- but that's because that guy would be dead, whereas you're very much alive for the moment, so you're automatically immune to getting your corpse looted, which is why... Okay you lost the handle on that analogy. Forget it. Before you sit the following: three JUGGLING CLUBS, three JUGGLING RINGS, two DIABOLOS and one pair of DIABOLO STICKS (the other diabolo and the pair of sticks are back over here in this panel), one UNICYCLE (also in that panel), one EXTINGUISHED TORCH WHICH YOU GUESS COULD PROBABLY BE REIGNITED IF YOU FOUND THE APPROPRIATE RESOURCES, and one CHAINSAW. Too bad you only have three slots in your SYLLADEX right now. You will have to exercise some discretion. But you're quite certain that you can come up with three choices and tag them with some appropriate PRIORITY values, without which, you remind yourself, you can't captchalogue anything. You take a look at the SYLLADEX information reiterated at the bottom of this post, and prepare a thoughtful suggestion or two. The referent of "you" may or may not have shifted over the course of that paragraph. Just so you know. * SYLLADEX (PRIORITY MODUS)[1 Gasgano minifig] [2 Actors & Programmers Monthly] [3 ----] [4 ----] [5 ----] [6 Sburb beta] [7 hole-punched sheet music] [8 laptop] STRIFE PORTFOLIO: rapierKind {foil}
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Jun 9, 2011 16:12:23 GMT -5
> Flynn: I mean, where did she even GET that WHALE?!Good question! And one you would love to attempt to answer, but unfortunately, it appears that the SHIPWHALE absconded during the fray!!
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Jun 15, 2011 8:02:21 GMT -5
> Flynn: Get that TATTERED TIGHTROPE, priority four. Because lengths of cable are always handy.
Oh, good thinking! You never know if you'll need something rope-like once you make it to that place with all the lightning. You stand at the foot of one pole and then the other, detaching the two halves of the severed cable. Your PRIORITY MODUS is not only nice enough to let you captchalogue both of these functionally-identical items within one card, but even wraps them neatly into coils for you!!
GOOD MODUS; BEST FRIEND.
*
SYLLADEX (PRIORITY MODUS) [1 Gasgano minifig] [2 Actors & Programmers Monthly] [3 ----] [4 two coils of tightrope] [5 ----] [6 Sburb beta] [7 hole-punched sheet music] [8 laptop] STRIFE PORTFOLIO: rapierKind {foil}
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Jun 15, 2011 8:14:07 GMT -5
> Flynn: Attempt to captchalogue the SHIPWHALE with a priority of three. Just in case.
Hmm. Well, it's worth a shot. You just kind of stand there and request that the modus captchalogue the SHIPWHALE, even though he or she is nowhere to be seen.
Aaaand that doesn't work.
Bummer. That SHIPWHALE got away faster than you'd've expected a sea creature to. Hopefully it's still on the property somewhere. But never mind that now.
You captchalogue the EXTINGUISHED TORCH WHICH YOU GUESS COULD PROBABLY BE REIGNITED IF YOU FOUND THE APPROPRIATE RESOURCES, because if you can't have a beautiful and majestic ocean mount, a vision of perfectly white rolling sails and thrashing flukes as black as the depths, which is in essence the most perfect means of naval conveyance imaginable, then you guess being able to see your way around caves and shit is okay too.
And then.
AND MOTHERFECKING THEN.
*
SYLLADEX (PRIORITY MODUS) [1 Gasgano minifig] [2 Actors & Programmers Monthly] [3 extinguished torch] [4 two coils of tightrope] [5 ----] [6 Sburb beta] [7 hole-punched sheet music] [8 laptop] STRIFE PORTFOLIO: rapierKind {foil}
|
|
|
Post by Beelzebibble on Jun 15, 2011 8:15:15 GMT -5
> Flynn: mumble mumble CHAINSAW mumble mumble
|
|