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Post by Tout-Perd on Nov 29, 2015 17:12:14 GMT -5
The "Blackbird Kills the ORP Universe" topic got me thinking. So, if there was a boxing tournament among the Exodus characters, sans powers, who would win? Assume the following: -No characters have their powers. Any modifications to their body that put them outside "baseline human" don't exist for the tournament. -The character is informed they'll be in a boxing match in 48 hours, and have that time to prepare themselves and train. -No cheating!
The two tournaments I'm interested in right now are: -Wuss Tier: Nopcsa Garth Renard (I kinda want to put Alyssa in this slot, because I get a feeling she'd do hilariously well.) - - - -
-Badass Tier: Yoshimitsu Huckabee Natalie Almudena - - - -
I've left four open slots in each for you, the readers, to suggest characters that'd be fun in this level of competition. (Huge beefy guys like Cesare and Jonas would likely get their own tier, so I'm leaving them out for now.)
Once we're full up on characters, I'll randomize pairings, and start putting these matches to votes.
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Post by Yoshimitsu on Nov 29, 2015 17:45:21 GMT -5
Yoshimitsu would get disqualified straight away.
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Post by ch00beh on Nov 29, 2015 20:32:20 GMT -5
Rie is still trained as a super soldier for hand to hand combat, even without the super strength or reflexes. Straight boxing she might not be so good, but if it's UFC with grappling and stuff allowed, she will kick the snot out of her opponent, maybe.
Mandelbrot knows kung fu and given 48 hours will know if the opponent has hurt themselves in any way in the past and what kind of style they fight with.
Julia takes self defense classes with Saeptum. She can pretty easily overpower thugs on the street, especially if she comes as Masquerade and thus doesn't care as much about hurting people.
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Post by Tout-Perd on Nov 29, 2015 20:56:45 GMT -5
I kinda like Masquerade for Badass Tier. Makes it so you've got raw physical competence (Natalie) vs. pragmatic experience (Huckabee) vs. a fast, tricky, Muhammad Ali style fighter (Yoshimitsu) vs. the closest thing to a trained boxer on the Exy right now (Almudena) vs. sheer balls-to-the-wall lunacy (Masquerade). I get a feeling Masquerade would totally pull a Tyson and bite somebody's ear off. Well, okay, maybe she's not THAT much of an adrenaline junkie, but it's on the table.
Also, how would Yoshi get disqualified? Trying to cheat, or using an illegal technique, or deliberately DQing himself?
Who would be in the "Big Guy" group? Cesare, Jonas, Prime, and Hector come to mind, but I feel I'm overlooking a few other elephants in the room. (Also, we may only have four decent wusses for this? I kinda think Massimo could thrash all four of them, and Yoon wouldn't even show. Well, maybe Landsvale, but despite being a pretty mellow guy, he had to pass fitness exam to be a cop at SOME point, sooo... Ooh, ooh, maybe The Curator, though again, he might just plow through the whole tier.)
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Post by Beelzebibble on Nov 29, 2015 21:04:39 GMT -5
Missing somebody for Big Guy tier? Williams says hello.
EDIT: Marshall cuts a pretty commanding figure too, if I'm not wrong.
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Post by Tout-Perd on Nov 29, 2015 21:23:27 GMT -5
You know, I was going to rule out Williams, until I realized that he'd be informed he'd be facing a bunch of Powers without their Powers, and legally excused for beating the snot out of them...
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Post by The Evil Biscuit on Nov 29, 2015 23:19:39 GMT -5
Obviously I vote Blackbird. I also nominate Rance West, who I believe is an experienced boxer anyway.
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Post by Tout-Perd on Nov 29, 2015 23:39:50 GMT -5
That'd put badasses at Nat, Yoshimitsu (?), Almudena, Huckabee, Blackbird, Rance, and Masquerade. And possibly Rie or Mandelbrot, though I think that Huckabee/Blackbird would cover most of Mandelbrot's interesting tricks with stalking people and dirty fighting.
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Post by ch00beh on Nov 30, 2015 0:57:30 GMT -5
Rie will not hesitate to kick you in the nuts
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Post by Yoshimitsu on Nov 30, 2015 2:47:52 GMT -5
Actually he probably wouldn't get disqualified. Yoshi is a combat pragmatist most of the time (he sees a chance for a groin kick? He's gonna take it) but in theory, he'd follow the rules of a fight.
For the wuss group, I'll throw out Antonio since he can't fight his way out of a paper bag.
Agreed about Marshall for the Big Guy group.
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Post by The Evil Biscuit on Nov 30, 2015 11:28:05 GMT -5
I don't have many mains to nominate for Big Guy group - Brat Millsap falls into the Wuss category but Harris Goodman would go Zangief on 'em all. Waylon Bell's got that Straight Outta fighting style so he could probably hold on for a round but he's doomed against anyone with actual fighting experience.
I will say though that Biscuit!Lucas can box like a stone-fisted demon and will probably be a strong contender for the Heavyweight title if allowed.
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Post by Tout-Perd on Nov 30, 2015 11:50:32 GMT -5
Biscuit!Lucas is in for heavy tier, meaning it'll be Williams, Marshall, Cesare, Prime, Jonas, Lucas, Hector, and one slot left. I'd throw Sthenelus in, but he's stupid huge compared to everybody, and stupidly ripped (unlike Jonas, who has enough pudge to slow him down to a fair fight.)
Wuss Tier is currently: Nopcsa, Garth, Renard, the Curator, Antonio, and sure, Alyssa, why not? Two spots left.
Badass Tier, let's throw Rie in and drop Almudena for Aquara. So that puts us at Rie, Natalie, Masquerade, Huckabee, Rance, Blackbird, Yoshimitsu, Aquara. I'll post the pairings tonight.
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Post by ch00beh on Nov 30, 2015 11:56:22 GMT -5
can we have a qualifying round with Mandelbrot vs Blackbird and then Blackbird gets the confirmed win
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Post by Tout-Perd on Nov 30, 2015 11:58:13 GMT -5
Biscuit, how would you feel about a preliminary qualifying round between the Power killers?
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Post by Tout-Perd on Nov 30, 2015 13:28:57 GMT -5
Decided to add Lorenna (from Moss) and Eddie (the stoner sniper from Ghosts and Rust) to wuss tier. I think we'll run them first, since they're some of the more interesting pairings.
That puts the tier at: -Alyssa -Nopcsa -Lorenna -Garth -Antonio -The Curator -Renard -Eddie
The first round of matches will be: -Nopcsa vs. Eddie -Garth vs. Renard -Alyssa vs. Antonio -The Curator vs. Lorenna
I'll talk more in depth about the first matchup tonight, and voting will run midnight EST tonight to midnight tomorrow.
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Post by Yoshimitsu on Nov 30, 2015 14:16:02 GMT -5
In the cases of our characters are up, should we provide some sort of commentary about the 48 hours they've been given to prepare?
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Post by The Evil Biscuit on Nov 30, 2015 14:17:20 GMT -5
Biscuit, how would you feel about a preliminary qualifying round between the Power killers? I would enjoy this.
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Post by Tout-Perd on Nov 30, 2015 20:49:08 GMT -5
Think less like an RP, more like Mafia accusations. You give why you think somebody would win (or lose), and then your vote. It won't require creator input, though creators are free to further expound upon their character when they have a character up.
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Post by Tout-Perd on Dec 1, 2015 14:10:10 GMT -5
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, PRESENTING OUR FIRST BOUT!
IN THIS CORNER, WE HAVE NOPCSA, THE FIST OF THE FASCERE ORDER! Strengths: Great at trash talk, very quick and agile. Has shown that even without his mindreading, he's a very evasive fighter who is willing to fight dirty. Weaknesses: Nopcsa has basically no punching power whatsoever. His only punch that did anything gave Sikes a minor nosebleed, and broke his hand.
AND IN THIS CORNER, EDDIE, THE STONE(R) COLD SNIPER! Strengths: Eddie of course has superb accuracy. If he tokes up before the fight, he may actually be too high realize Nopcsa is trash talking him. Or hitting him, for that matter. Weaknesses: Eddie isn't that much stronger than Nopcsa, and if he comes in high, he's likely going to be far too slow to be able to lay a hand on Nopcsa, who at least evasively, can almost keep up with triained brawlers.
So will Nopcsa spend the whole match dancing around Eddie, or will Eddie simply let the mindreader punch himself out while he's trying to decide what to get at Taco Bell after the match? YOU DECIDE.
LADIES AND GENTS, BEGIN YOUR VOTING!
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Post by Beelzebibble on Dec 1, 2015 15:02:52 GMT -5
Okay so like, Eddie's super jittery, right? Like his thing is he has to be crisping jays all the time just to keep his hands still. I feel like if he shows up sober, Nopcsa would probably find it really easy to throw Eddie off and keep him distracted with trash talk. But the flipside is that if Nopcsa said the wrong thing, Eddie might explode and unleash a can of twitchy whoopass on him. And without his mindreading powers, Nopcsa can't gauge the potential results of anything he says.
Basically if Eddie has any kind of berserk button at all then you know Nopcsa's gonna punch it, because Nopcsa just talks so damn much. That could be trouble for Nopcsa.
Or if Eddie shows up stoned then, I don't know, they probably just go hit up White Castle but Nopcsa tricks Eddie into paying for both of them. So Nopcsa gets free shitty burgers. You could call that a victory.
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Post by The Evil Biscuit on Dec 1, 2015 15:40:32 GMT -5
BISCUIT'S SCORECARD NOPCSA | ROUND | EDDIE | 9 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 2 | 0 | 9 | 3 | 1? | 9 | 4 | 1 | 5 | 5 | 0 | 6 | 6 | 0 | 6 | 7 | 1 | 4 | 8 | 0 | 4 | 9 | 1 | 2 | 10 | 0 | 64 | TOTAL | 4/5 |
Decent light-heavyweight matchup, but I don't know who didn't see this getting called for the fleet-footed Fascere Fist. Nopcsa opened well in the early rounds with easy flurries and a storm of jab combos that quickly established a momentum that would carry him through the rest of the fight. The undercard Eddie seemed distracted, taking the punches in stride but offering no answer to Nopcsa's endless barrages except for what could almost be considered a 'get off me' slap late in the third. The fourth round saw a glimpse of that raw potential bubbling under Eddie's surface that makes him the fighter to watch in the next year. Nopcsa connects with his jaw, Eddie finally focuses in and delivers a withering left hook that carves a permanent look of shock and disbelief on the Fascere fighter's face for the next several rounds. The next rounds see a completely different Nopcsa than the firebrand machinegun that roared out of the gate at opening bell. He is not used to getting hit this hard. He plays defense, relying on his footwork to rush him out of harm's way and reserving his punches for safer openings. Eddie continues to fight disinterested until late in the sixth when he reaches out with a devastating right that drops Nopcsa to one knee. The bell spares him, though Eddie did not take advantage of a rushdown. Nopcsa has completely run out of gas in the ninth, and a crushing blow from Eddie nearly puts him under. He hits the mat but rises on eight. Eddie believes he has won, and celebrates for the entire 10th round. The blogosphere speculates that Eddie may have cut weight from Cruiser divisions to drum up easy wins in a lighter class. Some allege drug use contributed to his distraction and lack of reaction to punches. It winds up being a moot point; only one boxer in the ring tonight showed up to fight. Decision: NOPCSA EDIT:So I totally just posted my test format up that called the whole thing for Nopcsa and that is mad untrue. I removed it and will post it when the voting is finished.
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Post by Tout-Perd on Dec 1, 2015 15:51:49 GMT -5
I need better photoshop skills, so I can whip up "Nopcsa and Eddie Go to Whitecastle". Personally, I think that Nopcsa would take it by decision. Neither one has enough oomph to lay the other one out, or really warrant a TKO even, so it all comes down to who can take the slap fight. And Nopcsa is enough of a pest that he'd revel in it. I think Biscuit called it near perfectly. Nopcsa spends the majority of the match humiliating Eddie, and Eddie has two or three moments of briliance. (Tragic missed opportunity, though. You should have had Eddie do something resulting in 15 more questionable punches, so his final score becomes 4/20. ) (Brilliant write up, btw.)
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Post by Tout-Perd on Dec 1, 2015 15:55:09 GMT -5
(BTW, for the sake of fairness, I only count my own vote for half a point. I'm merely the tiebreaker in all of these.)
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Post by Yoshimitsu on Dec 1, 2015 16:01:50 GMT -5
Or if Eddie shows up stoned then, I don't know, they probably just go hit up White Castle but Nopcsa tricks Eddie into paying for both of them. So Nopcsa gets free shitty burgers. You could call that a victory. I would read that. But yeah, I think Biscuit nailed it on the head. The only way I see Eddie winning is some crackfic nonsense about Eddie needing his next high and it happens to be in Nopcsa's pocket. Point Nopcsa
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Post by The Evil Biscuit on Dec 1, 2015 16:33:23 GMT -5
Okay so I'm seeing a pattern emerging here and I'm going to change up my future votes to compensate - if it's all right with you, Lee, I'd like to post the fightcards, match summary, and standings after the initial voting. I don't want to sway votes with a speculative play-by-play, and I also see stuff in the voted posts that I really would have liked to have used in the summary. If you were planning on doing your own decision posts, though, don't let me stomp on your parade.
Also, if anybody wants to add their own scorecard please feel free to quote my tables for easy formatting. Scoring is simple; it is just the number of punches LANDED by each fighter in each round (we only count successful punches in boxing). So Nopcsa landed 9 punches in round 1, 10 punches in round 2, and 9 again in round 3, while Eddie threw zero for all three rounds except for one questionable hit.
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Post by Yoshimitsu on Dec 1, 2015 17:37:41 GMT -5
I'm not sure if it's people agreeing with your fight scorecard and commentary, I think it's more you put into words what some people were thinking. Can't speak for Lee but you pretty much nailed my thoughts about it - Nopcsa gets offensive from the get-go and gets surprised when Eddie lashes out was my main thoughts.
The alternative I was thinking about was that Eddie needed his next fix and Nopcsa had it in his pocket, but it was kinda negated by the whole regular person thing.
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