> Flynn: Read an excerpt from the book. Have a hole in the page amusingly change the meaning.
Wait, never mind. No big deal. I mean, small-to-moderate-sized deal maybe, but no big deal. This is one of your SHEET MUSIC BOOKS you've had since forever. Doubtlessly if you were to read an excerpt it would come to light that the holes in the pages had amusingly struck out some notes or something, but you've got this stuff all learned by heart anyway! This isn't the end of the world.
It's not like your MOM's going to complain. She's the one who gave you most of your piano music, but what she doesn't know won't hurt her, right? Because she's not here anymore! So there's no way she could possibly find out! Boy that sure is convenient!
You sit down at the PIANO, which is somehow far less immaculately drawn than it was the last time you checked but no problem. You prop up the sheet music merely as a formality, even though you could play this number with your eyes closed. You take a deep breath. It is fine. Everything is fine. It does not matter that you impaled your favorite book of sheet music. It does not matter that trolls are real. It does not matter that your parents are gone and your SISTER is a lunatic. It does not matter that Tweak Moustache is a flagrant homosexual with a slew of mental deficiencies.
Time to fill up this air with some nice, quiet, calm sounds. That'd be so good for you right now. So soothing. For you. Right now.
> Flynn: Captchalogue sheet music with a priority of 7.
Uh, okay. You're the boss. You captchalogue the HOLE-PUNCHED SHEET MUSIC with a PRIORITY of 7.
I mean, all I'm saying is, don't you think that's a little high up there? It's just some sheet music. That's your second most valuable card right now. But whatever. No, seriously, it's okay. You're just curious how you came up with that notion. Why the snap decision, 7? Maybe is there an acquaintance you were subconsciously thinking of who has a thematic connection to the number seven?
This is an oddly specific idea to pop into your head all at once like that yet the more you think about it the more you suspect that it is true.
> Flynn: Talk with somebody cheerful and nice on Formspring Pesterchum.
Oh you know what, you totally know who you were thinking of. You hit this person up on Pesterchum posthaste. If you're subconsciously edging toward chatting with her it'd be better to just get that out of the way and not have it resurface disastrously later.
-- forteHolder [FH] began pestering apotropaicReverie [AR] --
FH: Kitten I'm letting you know now, if you ever get the chance to be me for a day this is the right one to pick. FH: I'm up to my neck in cute and lovable critters over here! AR: Wha Whaaaaa~? AR: Lucky~ Today~s like a bucket of dung getting dumped on all your stuff <|:c AR: Literally, tooooooo </3 FH: /o noʊ:/ FH: Okay let’s not swap then. Why’s that? AR: Golly golly Flynn it's just been such a mess today </3 AR: All the animals are still here and poor Sir Krumples is missing D:|> AR: That darned thing in the bread drawer better not have taken him~ AR: And and....</3 FH: The fabled thing in the bread drawer! Someday you will tell us what it actually is. AR: Ah no it is too graphic for even the dirtiest of minds D:|> AR: Anywaaaaaaay, I feel like I forgot what I was supposed to accomplish after turning on the computer~ AR: Oh well~! I don~t think anyone~s doing anyfink today so I~ll just turn it off later~ FH: Uh… FH: Anyfink except play Sburb maybe? FH: Is that somefink? AR: Uhhhhhhh AR: Oopsies! That may have been it, teehee~! FH: I mean let me know if I’m being the dumb one here but I don’t think so, right? FH: Didn’t you win one of the contest awards? I thought I saw your name on the list. AR: Oh yeah, I did! I won Most Diabetes-Inducing <3 AR: Whatever that means~ AR: Wanna hear it~? <|:D FH: Yeah, give me the link. FH: I’d look for it myself but it is so hard finding topics on this vast, crowded, bustling, never-quiet message board we call home! AR: Here! exophthalmicarchimandrites.com/index.cgi?board=writing&action=display&thread=7609 AR: Isn't it adooooooorable <3 FH: Okay, let’s just take a look at FH: Oh FH: /o/ FH: I FH: /ʊɢx/ FH: /blɜaʊɢx/ FH: /θæts ʌ/ FH: /θæts riəlaɪ swit/ FH: I mean. That’s really sweet! FH: I FH: /dʒizəs/ AR: Whaaaaaat~? AR: Are you doing that thing where you're being witty again cause you know I'm no good at that </3 AR: But thank you! <3 FH: /əm yɛə/ FH: You’re… You’re welcome. FH: Listen, I think I need to… eat or drink… something. FH: /so:ʊ/ I’m gonna go! Talk to you later I guess. Maybe let me know when that game rolls in, huh? I want to make sure we’re all in this together. AR: Um, alright! I'll do my best! AR: You know, if I remember~ AR: See you, Mister Flynn <3
You cannot do it. You cannot get the taste out of your mouth.
That was the sickly-sweetest, sappiest, saccharinest STORY you ever laid eyes on. Feels like your tongue got stuck to a frozen sugar cane on a sunny winter's day. You're going to need to ease up on talking to Kitten for a while if you don't want your teeth to individually develop DIABETES.
> Flynn: Eat some fucking lunch or something I mean god damn.
I mean, you're not hungry at all, but... yeah... yeah, you are going to have to go eat or drink something. It is the only way. Handsprings have failed you.
Too bad. It was pretty fun seeing how long you could linger in your BEDROOM without accomplishing anything productive.
You shed a SINGLE MANLY TEAR as you say goodbye for now to your beloved room. It is a good thing your face is not visible from our perspective, for the emotional heft of this sorry moment would be almost too much for us to handle. The whole thing would be very SYMBOLIC, serving as a representation of the sheer terror felt by a young one as they depart the nest to seek their fortune in the world, never to return to their hallowed home. This SYMBOLISM would obviously stand on its own as an isolated story note and wouldn't be remotely threatened by the fact that you'd totally come back to your BEDROOM later on.
Oh, by the way, I guess you captchalogue your LAPTOP before you go. Got to keep up with your adoring CHUMS, and your portable might not be enough to handle the incoming boot-licking. You assign it a priority of 8 so the HOLE-PUNCHED SHEET MUSIC doesn't go flying everywhere as soon as you try to answer someone. Seriously what were you even thinking assigning that a priority of 7, what a BS MOVE.
See? Here you are returning to your BEDROOM now. It's clearly NO BIG DEAL.
What the hell?? This isn't the end! This is, like, two-thirds of the way through at best! Wow, this TRACKING SYSTEM is nothing but a CHEAP PIECE OF SHIT, isn't it. Might mess the whole device up if we keep on like this. We meekly return to our previous viewpoint upon the timeline, and pledge not to attempt such dramatic jumps ahead in the future.
Last Edit: Feb 11, 2011 19:38:38 GMT -5 by Molebolge
Well, at least the KITCHEN is nearly free of the evidence of your SISTER's OBSESSION WITH REPTILES AND AMPHIBIANS. And at least this entire section of the house contains no trace of her OTHER OBSESSION.
All the same, that TURTLE MAT back in the other room is kind of creeping you out a little. It just won't stop staring at you. That is something that it will not stop keep doing. You KEEP YOUR COOL though. As we know perfectly well by now, you are remarkably good at KEEPING YOUR COOL.
> Flynn: Notice something old pinned to the fridge with a magnet. Wax nostalgic.
Wow, this DRAWING takes you back a ways. What were you when you threw this one together, like five?
It's kinda nice. Observe how happy your MOM and DAD look. Even though DAD looks like Mickey Mouse got self-conscious about his ears and had plastic surgery, and MOM appears to have two right thumbs. But, you know, they were cheerful folk in spite of it all. Are cheerful folk. Obviously -- because they are definitely still out there somewhere. Having ADVENTURES AND SHIT. Good. You're glad we got that settled. Phew!
Oh, and how about this?? Seems as though SOMEONE was uncomfortable with seeing her face portrayed in such photorealistic detail. A little standoffish there, aren't we, SIS? Sheesh. This will not do at all. Your SISTER looks like your SISTER, not a voiceless glottal plosive. It's totally throwing off this lovely family portrait.
You are going to have to reaffix the DRAWING to the REFRIGERATOR in such a way that the MAGNET won't obscure a single stroke of this masterpiece. But if only there were a catchier, more concise way to phrase that.
Last Edit: Feb 18, 2011 1:33:27 GMT -5 by Molebolge